The worshiper is… H. L. Mencken

The worshiper is the father of the gods.

H. L. Mencken

US editor (1880 - 1956)

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in H. L. Mencken | | 0 Comments

Happiness is an… Thomas Szasz

Happiness is an imaginary condition, formerly attributed by the living to the dead, now usually attributed by adults to children, and by children to adults.

Thomas Szasz

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in Thomas Szasz | | 0 Comments

Getting out of bed… Jules Feiffer

Getting out of bed in the morning is an act of false confidence.

Jules Feiffer

US cartoonist & satirist (1929 - )

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in Jules Feiffer | | 0 Comments

The creator of the… Scott Adams

The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers.

Scott Adams

US cartoonist (1957 - )

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in Scott Adams | | 0 Comments

“Coolidge is dead”… Dorothy Parker

“Coolidge is dead” “How could they tell?

Dorothy Parker

US author, humorist, poet, & wit (1893 - 1967)

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in Dorothy Parker | | 0 Comments

I have just… Fred Allen

I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there.

Fred Allen

US radio comedian (1894 - 1956)

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in Fred Allen | | 0 Comments

Even he, to whom… Douglas Adams

Even he, to whom most things that most people would think were pretty smart were pretty dumb, thought it was pretty smart.

Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt, p. 205

English humorist & science fiction novelist (1952 - 2001)

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in Douglas Adams | | 0 Comments

Believe those who… Andre Gide

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.

Andre Gide

French critic, essayist, & novelist (1869 - 1951)

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in Andre Gide | | 0 Comments

I married the first… Barbara Bush

I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell my children that they just about throw up.

Barbara Bush

US wife of George Bush 1945 (1925 - )

July 31st, 2007 - Posted in Barbara Bush | | 0 Comments

I have been… Adlai E. Stevenson Jr.

I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends… that if they will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them.

Adlai E. Stevenson Jr., Speech during 1952 Presidential Campaign

US diplomat & Democratic politician (1900 - 1965)

July 30th, 2007 - Posted in Adlai E. Stevenson Jr. | | 0 Comments

I get plenty of… Red Skelton

I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.

Red Skelton

July 30th, 2007 - Posted in Red Skelton | | 0 Comments

Most men do not… Leo Rosten

Most men do not mature, they simply grow taller.

Leo Rosten

US (Polish-born) author (1908 - )

July 30th, 2007 - Posted in Leo Rosten | | 0 Comments

There is a… Douglas Adams

There is a particular disdain with which Siamese cats regard you. Anyone who has walked in on the Queen cleaning her teeth will be familiar with the feeling.

Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt, p. 215

English humorist & science fiction novelist (1952 - 2001)

July 30th, 2007 - Posted in Douglas Adams | | 0 Comments

Live as you will… Christian Furchtegott Gellert

Live as you will have wished to have lived when you are dying.

Christian Furchtegott Gellert

July 30th, 2007 - Posted in Christian Furchtegott Gellert | | 0 Comments

An intellectual… Dan Rather

An intellectual snob is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture and not think of The Lone Ranger.

Dan Rather

US television newscaster (1931 - )

July 30th, 2007 - Posted in Dan Rather | | 0 Comments

He had occasional… Sydney Smith

He had occasional flashes of silence, that made his conversation perfectly delightful.

Sydney Smith, referring to Macaulay

English essayist (1771 - 1845)

July 29th, 2007 - Posted in Sydney Smith | | 0 Comments

“If you were my… Lady Astor and William Churchill

“If you were my husband, i would feed you poison.” “If you were my wife, madam, i would take it!

Lady Astor and William Churchill

July 29th, 2007 - Posted in Lady Astor and William Churchill | | 0 Comments

The foolish man… James Oppenheim

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet.

James Oppenheim

July 29th, 2007 - Posted in James Oppenheim | | 0 Comments

Science can purify… Pope John Paul II (Karol Wojtyla)

Science can purify religion from error and superstition. Religion can purify science from idolatry and false absolutes.

Pope John Paul II (Karol Wojtyla), James Reston, Galileo, A Life, HarperCollins, NY, 1994, p 461.

July 29th, 2007 - Posted in Pope John Paul II (Karol Wojtyla) | | 0 Comments

If the aborigine… Stanley Garn

If the aborigine drafted an IQ test, all of Western civilization would presumably flunk it.

Stanley Garn

July 29th, 2007 - Posted in Stanley Garn | | 0 Comments

Behind every… Maryon Pearson

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

Maryon Pearson

July 29th, 2007 - Posted in Maryon Pearson | | 0 Comments

I found out that… Yakov Smirnoff

I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.

Yakov Smirnoff

July 28th, 2007 - Posted in Yakov Smirnoff | | 0 Comments

He has a splendid… Abba Eban

He has a splendid repertoire of 500 words. Why does he insist on using only 150?

Abba Eban

Israeli (S. African-born) diplomat & politician (1915 - 2002)

July 28th, 2007 - Posted in Abba Eban | | 0 Comments

All bad poetry… Oscar Wilde

All bad poetry springs from genuine feeling.

Oscar Wilde

Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 - 1900)

July 28th, 2007 - Posted in Oscar Wilde | | 0 Comments

Man will… Winston Churchill

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but usually manages to pick himself up, walk over or around it, and carry on.

Winston Churchill, Quoted in: Irving Klotz, Bending perception, a book review, Nature, 1996, Volume 379, p 412

July 28th, 2007 - Posted in Winston Churchill | | 0 Comments

One reason the… Wilfrid Sheed

One reason the human race has such a low opinion of itself is that it gets so much of its wisdom from writers.

Wilfrid Sheed

July 28th, 2007 - Posted in Wilfrid Sheed | | 0 Comments

Freedom is not… Mahatma Gandhi

Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.

Mahatma Gandhi

Indian ascetic & nationalist leader (1869 - 1948)

July 28th, 2007 - Posted in Mahatma Gandhi | | 0 Comments

My mother-in-law… Phyllis Diller

My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee.

Phyllis Diller

July 28th, 2007 - Posted in Phyllis Diller | | 0 Comments

The future,… John Sladek

The future, according to some scientists, will be exactly like the past, only far more expensive.

John Sladek

July 27th, 2007 - Posted in John Sladek | | 0 Comments

Too bad all the… George Burns

Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair.

George Burns

US actor & comedian (1896 - 1996)

July 27th, 2007 - Posted in George Burns | | 0 Comments

The more violent… Paul Fussell

The more violent the body contact of the sports you watch, the lower your class.

Paul Fussell

July 27th, 2007 - Posted in Paul Fussell | | 0 Comments

The secret of… Benjamin Disraeli

The secret of success is constancy to purpose.

Benjamin Disraeli

British politician (1804 - 1881)

July 27th, 2007 - Posted in Benjamin Disraeli | | 0 Comments

The cosmos is a… H. L. Mencken

The cosmos is a gigantic flywheel making 10,000 revolutions per minute. Man is a sick fly taking a dizzy ride on it.

H. L. Mencken

US editor (1880 - 1956)

July 27th, 2007 - Posted in H. L. Mencken | | 0 Comments

A coward is… Mahatma Gandhi

A coward is incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave.

Mahatma Gandhi

Indian ascetic & nationalist leader (1869 - 1948)

July 27th, 2007 - Posted in Mahatma Gandhi | | 0 Comments

Life is hard. After… Katherine Hepburn

Life is hard. After all, it kills you.

Katherine Hepburn

July 27th, 2007 - Posted in Katherine Hepburn | | 0 Comments

Education is what… B.F. Skinner

Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten

B.F. Skinner

July 26th, 2007 - Posted in B.F. Skinner | | 0 Comments

How do you govern a… Charles De Gaulle

How do you govern a country which has 246 different kinds of cheese?

Charles De Gaulle

French general & politician (1890 - 1970)

July 26th, 2007 - Posted in Charles De Gaulle | | 0 Comments

Pessimist: One who,… Oscar Wilde

Pessimist: One who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both.

Oscar Wilde

Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 - 1900)

July 26th, 2007 - Posted in Oscar Wilde | | 0 Comments

You must be the… Mahatma Gandhi

You must be the change you want to see in the world.

Mahatma Gandhi

Indian ascetic & nationalist leader (1869 - 1948)

July 26th, 2007 - Posted in Mahatma Gandhi | | 0 Comments

I am not an… Paul McCracken

I am not an Economist. I am an honest man!

Paul McCracken

July 26th, 2007 - Posted in Paul McCracken | | 0 Comments

The only tyrant I… Mahatma Gandhi

The only tyrant I accept in this world is the still voice within.

Mahatma Gandhi

Indian ascetic & nationalist leader (1869 - 1948)

July 26th, 2007 - Posted in Mahatma Gandhi | | 0 Comments

The only aspect of… Martha Gellman

The only aspect of our travels that is interesting to others is disaster.

Martha Gellman

July 26th, 2007 - Posted in Martha Gellman | | 0 Comments

When you betray… Isaac Bashevis Singer

When you betray somebody else, you also betray yourself.

Isaac Bashevis Singer

US (Polish-born) Jewish author (1904 - 1991)

July 25th, 2007 - Posted in Isaac Bashevis Singer | | 0 Comments

Life is like an… Charles M. Schulz

Life is like an ice-cream cone, you have to lick it one day at a time.

Charles M. Schulz, as “Charlie Brown”, Peanuts, cartoon strip

US cartoonist (1922 - 2000)

July 25th, 2007 - Posted in Charles M. Schulz | | 0 Comments

An idealist is one… H. L. Mencken

An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.

H. L. Mencken

US editor (1880 - 1956)

July 25th, 2007 - Posted in H. L. Mencken | | 0 Comments

To be nobody but… e e cummings

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle any human being can fight and never stop fighting.

e e cummings

US poet (1894 - 1962)

July 25th, 2007 - Posted in e e cummings | | 0 Comments

Now is the time for… Walt Kelly

Now is the time for all good men to come to.

Walt Kelly

US animator & cartoonist (1913 - 1973)

July 25th, 2007 - Posted in Walt Kelly | | 0 Comments

An eye for eye only… Mahatma Gandhi

An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.

Mahatma Gandhi

Indian ascetic & nationalist leader (1869 - 1948)

July 25th, 2007 - Posted in Mahatma Gandhi | | 0 Comments

Travel, instead of… Elizabeth Drew

Travel, instead of broadening the mind, often merely lengthens the conversation.

Elizabeth Drew

July 25th, 2007 - Posted in Elizabeth Drew | | 0 Comments

The chief value of… H. L. Mencken

The chief value of money lies in the fact that one lives in a world in which it is overestimated.

H. L. Mencken

US editor (1880 - 1956)

July 24th, 2007 - Posted in H. L. Mencken | | 0 Comments

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